Single Moms? Is it easy for you to find dates, but then they fall apart after a few weeks?
Take a look at this list of six things you do to sabotage your relationships.
When you’re going out with a guy make sure you don’t:
Cling like a barnacle – When you’ve been through a nasty divorce, the last thing you want is to go through more heartache. But latching on to the current beau like he holds the key to your oxygen supply will only drive him away. I’m not suggesting pretending to be aloof or make him chase you to prove he cares — that’s no good either. However, don’t wrap yourself with an iron grip around the guys you date because you’re afraid they’re going to leave. Do that, and they probably will.
Talk way too much about your kids – There’s a lot to love and appreciate about you besides the fact that you’re an awesome mom. Talk about that. Your kids are a central part of your life and it would be weird to NOT talk about them, but make sure that’s not the only topic of conversation. Let your funky, spunky side show!
Give yourself away to anyone who asks – Being single means you’re free to explore your sexuality on your own terms and that’s exhilarating, but, for the love of god, don’t give yourself to every guy that asks — and that includes tossing around racy pictures of yourself to anyone who shows the slightest interest in you. When you’ve finally rid yourself of a lackluster or sexless marriage, it’s tempting to run around like a frat boy on spring break Don’t do it. Respect yourself and expect others to do the same. There’s no rule that says you have to have only one partner at a time but be discreet. When you do find a guy you’d like to explore a relationship with you’ll get started on the right foot if you haven’t given him the impression you’re easy.
Settle – Single moms often worry they won’t get another shot at love so they grab the first chance at a relationship they find. The first person you date as a newly-single woman may end up being your soulmate but that’s a pretty rare occurrence. Like dress shopping, we usually have to try on few before we find the perfect fit! So take your time and don’t just settle for the first dress, er, guy you see.
Treat your current squeeze like you treated your ex – Hear me on this: Your current beau is not your ex, so don’t treat him like he is. Unlearn the way you’re used to treating the man in your life because you probably picked up some bad habits and coping mechanisms while struggling through a marriage that wasn’t working. When you meet a new man leave your old baggage at the door.
Badmouth the father of your kids – No matter how poorly you think of your kids’ dad, keep it to yourself and save the vent sessions for your girlfriends. Your new guy doesn’t need to hear it and might wonder what you say about him when he’s not around. If you can’t bite your tongue when the subject of your childrens’ father comes up, consider this: If your beau has kids too, you might remind him of his ex when you prattle on about what a jerk your ex is. You don’t want him thinking of her when you’re together, right?
We’ve all made dating mistakes at some point so, single moms, now it’s your turn to be heard. What things can you think of that we do to mess up our relationships? Sound off in the comments.