Dear Mademoiselle X,
How do I gently steer my boyfriend towards doing what I like in bed without offending him? I don’t want to come off too aggressive but I’d like to show him what pleases me.
The Sensitive Girl
Dear Sensitive GF,
You’re awfully sweet to think of your boyfriend’s feelings here, I’m sure he’s very concerned with yours at that particular moment.
OK, ok, all kidding aside, you are right, boys are sensitive creatures and it does no one any good if you offend him right in the heat of the action. Never fear, there are a couple great ways to get your man to change it up in the right direction.
1) Long before the clothes go flying, you could leave lying around a Cosmo or two, turned to just the right page. (Come on, each one has at least one article about orgasms or sex tips right?) Those articles are irresistible to guys. Honestly, they want to know they’re the best lovers out there, so they gobble up tips wherever they can get them.
2) If you never got around to planting the magazine and now it’s too late because you’re both naked and hard at work, it’s time to take advantage of your natural acting talents. Basically, it’s all in the delivery. Use your deepest, sexiest, throatiest voice to murmur in his ear “I wonder how great it would feel if you “fill in whatever you’re dying for him to do.” or “I heard that XX is a real turn on.”
3) Fudge a little and assume that he’s always a little distracted when you’re having sex. Say to him (in that same sexy voice) “I really liked it that time when you did XXX.” Even if he assumes you’re remembering someone else doing that to you, he’s quickly going to want to replace that memory with him actually doing it!
Follow your gut and chose your moment well. Letting him know what he did wrong after the fact is a total buzz kill. Demanding something in a whiny tone isn’t going to make him want to do it either. And asking him how you can make him even hotter is a great way to start the “conversation.”
If you have questions of your own, please email them to youwontgoblind at gmail dot com and put madame x in the re: line.
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