by: Maria Lianos
You’ve been with your spouse for a number of years. You have kids. You work, come home, work some more and are exhausted by 9pm.
How the heck are you supposed to be in the mood to have sex?
This is something I hear all the time. Sad, isn’t it?
Who has the energy for sex at 10:00pm anyway? You’re probably ready to hit that pillow as soon as 8:30 pm rolls around. If only the kids would go to sleep before 9pm then maybe just maybe, there’d be a small chance we could get busy. But there’s always something that comes up. And maybe sometimes, you’d rather Tweet or blog than do the deed.
You have “date night”? Ah yes, a romantic candlelit dinner followed by salsa dancing at the club. Who are we kidding here?
How about morning? Most men wake up ready to go! But the kids are up by 6:30am and husband is already out the door so there goes that chance for sex at the crack of dawn.
Do you want to know the best time to have sex is? Lunch hour.
Sneak away during lunch hour for a quick afternoon romp. Tell your boss you have a sick child and take off work early before picking up the kids.
Both work outside the home? Do it like the good ole’ days – in your car.
Afternoon sex is much more convenient. You still have enough energy to actually have it, and if you’d had a morning workout, you’re more limber. Bonus! If you’re lucky and your kids nap, you can also take a quick snooze right after and be refreshed for the rest of the day. Like a mid-afternoon coffee and biscotti.
Before the kids arrived, you probably enjoyed sex morning, noon and night – anytime, anywhere, we were there. Oh those younger wilder years! It would just take one look and you would both drop everything and do it right there, no holds barred.
Now, you have to fit it into your hectic schedule: “Honey, can we do it tonight?” “No I can’t, I have too much to do. Maybe Saturday?” “Hmm, let me check my calendar.”
Some of us women complain about the fact that there is only enough time for a quickie – those fourteen minutes in between the kids’ bedtime and “Real Housewives of Beverly Hills”. Just enough time to get the deed done. In and out. (No pun intended.) No bubbles and scented candles, no dancing to Barry White and gazing into each other’s eyes… leave that gooey stuff to The Young and the Restless.
Realistically, most of us are so busy and exhausted, that fourteen minutes is all we have the time and energy for anyway! “Ok honey, let’s hurry up and do this! I have a million things to do!” Because the last thing you want to do while you’re making love is to recite your grocery shopping list, and completely ruin the mood.
The truth is, it’s not the quantity of the time – it’s the quality. In those fourteen minutes, a lot can happen. The whole house can shake and rumble, the roof can explode and the angels can sing Hallelujah!
I say, as long as you’re making an effort and getting some alone time, whether it’s an hour or even fourteen minutes, you’re on the right track!