Sexy vs Slutty: What’s the Difference?

We see them everywhere we turn, from TV to magazines and anywhere we look.

Scantily clad women showing off their belly ring, tramp stamp and whatever else hanging out, up, down and in-between.

Even worse? Moms who send their daughters off to functions like Bar and Bat Mitzvahs and school dances wearing nothing more than child-sized adult dresses. Their freshly budded cleavage exposed via plunging necklines. Their butts and genitals barely covered with strips of material masquerading as evening attire. They’re wearing their mother’s designer pumps, teetering perilously and comically around trying not to fall or break their ankle.

The adults are amused. They take photos. They share them on Facebook. 

We are training our daughters to dress slutty, which they are misinterpreting as being sexy and provocative. This in turn sends messages to our sons that girls are nothing more than arm pieces and sex objects. And what about that girl who’s rebelling against someone, like a strict and conservative parent?

The styles being shown on the runway and sold off the rack reinforce the “fact” that women should be stick thin and in bare skin. Women are seeing this, take that message to the malls and walk out the door with it.

Some say that when girls dress slutty (or “sexy” as they are calling it), it’s due to insecurity. The more you show, the more attention you get. The more attention you get, the better you feel about yourself.

But also, women like to feel  we’re better looking than other women around us.

We like to be the alpha female, the one that all men want to mate with. We brag to our girlfriends about the guys that picked us up at the bar and bought us drinks. We aren’t just telling, we are bragging the same way we brag when we get a really good deal on an expensive designer bag.

We all want to feel sexy and confident when we walk out the door. But that doesn’t have to mean exposing our bodies to the world. There has to be a happy medium.

Right now, the intended message isn’t the same one being received. Assumptions are being and they aren’t positive. And unfortunately, women involved in sexual assault cases still get a form of “maybe she asked for it” judgment.

Freedom of expression we all want. Smarter choices? We’d prefer.

What do you consider sexy attire? Are there brands that make you feel great, not like you’re on the corner looking to date? Weigh in on the comments section below!

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'Sexy vs Slutty: What’s the Difference?' have 2 comments

  1. June 21, 2012 @ 10:37 am @MryJhnsn from iNeedaPlaydate

    Confidence. It’s all about the confidence.

  2. June 21, 2012 @ 3:49 pm Lori Luza

    As a photographer, I work with girls and women of all ages, especially 17-18yo high school Seniors, engaged women, and brides. All of them want the same feeling from their portraits: sexy confidence. Sexy comes in a wide variety of age-appropriate contexts. The key is just that: age appropriate.


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