Too Fat for the Horizontal Bop?

Recent research out of London has shown that chubby ladies have more trouble finding a sexual partner than chubby men on the prowl. Of course, this same research has also shown that chubby men suffer from a higher rate of erectile dysfunction than their fit male counterparts, but maybe the skinny broad they brought home doesn’t really care about that.

Hey, ever notice how a lot of rich men are on the heavy side?

I can’t believe they spent all kinds of money to research this phenomena.

Really?

My only question? How the heck does it work? I mean with all the extras hanging down and the space between…

The people at ASKMEN.COM wrote about the difficulties two obese people might have in the bedroom.

They suggest using pillows to prop up, adjust and help. They also mention necessary stamina will be required.

Then there’s the specifics on positions, like this one:

The woof appeal. You knew this one was coming. That’s right; the infamous doggy style is for people of all shapes and sizes, although certain body types may still not be able to pull this one off.

If you have a potbelly that’s tight and reaches  down to your lower abdomen, then the aforementioned positions will be better suited for you. But if your  belly is mushy and moveable, then turn her around and get cracking.

The method: Place your partner on all fours, and before you let yourself go wild, take the time to caress her back and reach underneath to caress her breasts. Appreciate her body and then go all in. Place your penis inside her and embrace her lower cheeks — and hey, if she’s up for it, give her a little spank for her spunk!

I don’t know. I have never seen fat dogs go at it – or chubby porn for that matter. Call me closed-minded, but I think if something is a-jiggling that shouldn’t be, I say keep it wrapped up.

Editors note: Obviously, this subject gets a lot of attention–and jokes—but  sex will never be reserved for the super fit, despite our author’s position.

So, how do you feel about stats saying some folks are too big to get busy?

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'Too Fat for the Horizontal Bop?' have 5 comments

  1. July 15, 2011 @ 10:24 am Elizabeth Wheelock

    Wow!! Pretty interesting, hmmm!!!!

  2. September 28, 2011 @ 12:29 pm Lady Estrogen

    My larger-than-life friends swear by the reverse cowgirl.
    It does the trick ;)

  3. June 2, 2012 @ 6:01 am Tootie

    I dunno – having his bony pelvis grinding against mine just isn’t my idea of great sex. Apparently that old adage is true for me – I used to be built for speed. Now I’m built for comfort. :D

  4. June 2, 2012 @ 6:12 am Chanize

    ha! too much grinding on sharp objects creates a weapon, no?

  5. June 2, 2012 @ 9:46 am ArtsyJen

    I would think where there’s a will, there’s a way. I used to be bony. That’s a thing of the past.


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