It’s late, you’re tired and had too much to drink. Or, you’ve eaten too much Chinese food and feeling gassy. Yet, your partner is giving the signal that he is in the mood. Seriously? Rather than telling the one you’re with “not tonight, hon”, you perform.
But you know you aren’t going to make it to the big, earth-shattering ‘O’.
You’ll do what so many of us have done (or still do), just to save face for both of you.
You’ll fake the orgasm.
Now, as much as we know you hate it, research shows that 60% of women regularly fake orgasm during lovemaking.
And did you know that nearly 30% of men fake orgasm, as well?
Both men and women have similar reasons for this:
- They fear their own insecurities.
- Fear of intimacy.
- They want to please their partner.
- They really weren’t in the mood.
- They want to expedite the process.
- They are on medication that dulls the senses.
We want our partner to believe we are satisfied rather than admitting we weren’t able to achieve orgasm. But what men don’t understand is that for women, it’s not always about having the orgasm, it’s about the entire act before it. It’s about that sexual journey. The foreplay.
Many women fake it because they feel they are enhancing the experience. A turned on woman turns the man on, or so we women figure. The more we writhe with pleasure, the more excited our man gets and, we hope, the more powerful his orgasm.
Women have an easier time climaxing when they are making love with someone they are intimately connected with. I can vouch for that. I don’t fake orgasms anymore. I have no need to now, but in the past, I did. A lot. Nothing to be embarrassed about. It happens.
It seems, however, that constant faking it can have a negative impact on the relationship on many levels. Working on communication and intimacy can help overcome the need to always fake orgasms and bring on real waves to ride.
Shout it out! What makes you fake it?