Do you know someone who manages to get dates all the time? I’m not talking about people who get numerous first dates and no second ones. I’m talking about the people who seem to be out every weekend.
In this day and age, it seems harder to meet someone who’s intriguing, fun, entertaining, intelligent, outgoing, mentally balanced and financially stable. Not rich, mind you, but paying the bills and still able to go out once in a while.
Facebook has taken over the world as the top site for online searches, bypassing Google as the number one search engine for topics and discussion. Why is that? Probably because we are all like “family” and our recommendations are becoming more and more influential when it comes to decision making.
Facebook is like a family barbeque. You show pictures of your kids, share recipes, and post vacation photos. We invite people into the private parts of our lives on Facebook with our status updates everything going on. And, we all know someone with no pre-post filter or edit button, right?
And since we’re one, big happy family, getting the right date from a friend of a friend on Facebook can be easy, if you know how to do it.
1. Send a message with your friend request. When you are friending someone you don’t know personally, don’t just ask them out blindly. Thats creepy. Send a note. Something like this usually works well: “Hey, I am a friend of John’s too and I saw you were talking to him about your Cozumel vacationl! I also love traveling and have been to Cozumel. Did you visit the amazing seafood restaurant on the main street?” Or whatever. Open your request with a common link, your friend in common, followed by a shared interest from sports to food to Twilight novels. Don’t just dive in with a juvenile “You’re hot!” type statement. Guaranteed, that’ll get you a fast block and a “WTF, dude?” to your shared friend.
2. Scour Their Page. Once she/he has accepted your friend request, have a look at their page and take time to look at photos, and things they’re posting on. Nothing is more frustrating than having to play 21 questions when the answers are obvious. If they have kids, it will show in their pictures or in their statements. If they’re divorced or never married, pay attention to those hints on their page.
3. Know Their Interests. Look at the section that tells you what their reading, the food, movies they like, etc. Knowing these things help you ask intelligent questions that will help them determine whether YOU are dating material. If she is reading War and Peace, and you have only ever read graphic novels, you may want to either brush up on your literary world, or ask her about the book–why she likes it, why read such a huge story, her favorite part. These questions give her the opportunity to tell you more about her.
4. Give it Six Weeks. You need to give him at least six weeks to get to know you, look at your page, ask questions, and find out if you are a good fit for his life. WARNING: Do not instantly message him every time he comes on Facebook. That screams stalker. If he sees you are online and wants to talk to you, he will. Answer, even if you are in the middle of something. A short sweet, “hey great to hear from you. I am just talking to a buddy right now, is it alright if I message you back in 15 minutes” is all he needs to hear. Don’t ignore him if he sends you a message and sign out if you are no longer online.
The gist? Treat Facebook dating like your grandma’s family reunion. Sure, strike up a conversation with strangers, but get to know someone before you tell them your life story, embarrass yourself, or make plans for future dates. And oh yes, make sure you’re not related.
*image courtesy of Google Images